Amber’s Resolutions

1. Do NOT Word Vom on Marcus

Marcus is coming to the US this year. It’s fact. We know that a list of more tour dates is on the way and I WILL be going and seeing Marcus live. No matter what it takes. Last time (and the time before), I pretty much threw up all kinds of words on him (like Love Shack). I really want to act semi normal this time. I say semi cause I am realistic. The short pants make my head go crazy.

2. See Sam in Concert without Drinking.

This may have been my resolution last year as well. I majorly failed. Of course, I did think I’d have two shots to make it happen since I’ve seen Sam twice a year since 2009. But nope. I had one shot… and I screwed it up. I blame Sam a little. I mean, he did use his drink coupon buy me one of those beers. Then again, when I got the amazing birthday call this year, I realized I am completely unable to form words when I am stone cold sober. Somewhere, I gotta find a happy medium. I’ll just have to practice in advance.

3. Tweet more inappropriate things to Sam.

Clearly this is what is expected of us, per this conversation:

But LiLi is always the super clever one. I need to be more clever and ballsy and dirty. I mean, I need to just come out and say what we are all thinking. It will make for many more fun tweets.

4. Be less shy about my love of Sam and Marcus’ music with people who don’t know.

This one I am actually very serious about. Yes, I blog and tweet about these two guys so one would think I am very open about my love for their music. And I am… online. I’ve always had the interwebs to hide behind. This year I resolve to be more open about it all to people. Real life people, that is. I just get so weird about rejection when it’s something I love. This year… no more.

5. Get an interview with Marcus…. and of course, another one with Sam.

This is the one ground we have not conquered yet. An interview with Marcus. We have been talking about it since 2009. What we would do. What we would ask. What we would wear. And I am not gonna lie… it makes us crazy nervous. The first interview with Sam almost killed us with nerves. Now we are totally professional (ha!) about it and know what to go in expecting. So we’ll go for another one with Sam this year, no problem. But Marcus, we’re gonna get all those first time jitters again, and it is scary and awesome to think about all at the same time. But we WILL do it. Or at least ask his people if we can do it. They may decide we are crazy. Which is understandable.

LiLi’s Resolutions

1. Two Words: ROAD TRIP

Not that Dallas isn’t AWESOME…hello…but the last time that Amber and I took the ol’ Shack on the road we.had.a.blast. Plus it’s fun to meet and interact with other fans from around the country. That being said, in 2012, it’s my goal to pick an out of town show for, you know, whoever might be touring this year and make a weekend out of it.

2. Blog More

This is a huge problem of mine. I usually see a ton of things that I could blog about but then real life swoops in and then  1) I forget what it was I wanted to blog about, 2) remember, then start writing and hate everything I write so I delete it and then 3) forget what it was I wanted to blog about.  Well, no more my friends. My goal is to blog over here at least once a week. Even if it is just a picture of Sam wearing the shit out of a suit, with the caption, “here’s a pic of Sam wearing the shit out of a suit.”

3. To not say creepy things to Marcus

::sigh::

You guys. I STILL think about that moment that I leaned over and whispered in Marcus’ ear, “I blogged about you today.” And I STILL cringe. EVERY.TIME. I mean, why didn’t I just say “I collect all my fingernail clippings in a jar?” That would have been LESS creepy. I mean, no wonder he hasn’t come back to America. We ARE creepy and too in your face. This spring When he finally DOES come back, I resolve…no I VOW to just smile and nod and let Amber do all the talking. Wait…on second thought…

4. To interact more

I won’t lie. I am pretty shy in real life– when you first meet me. It mainly has to do with the fact that I am really self-conscious about the things I say (like “I blogged about you today”). I tend to be really awkward and sarcastic and I have a problem with trailing off the ends of my sentences when I am uncomfortable. Usually I just keep my mouth shut and not say too much. But, unfortunately, it makes me come off as cold and like a snob, so I haven’t made the best impression with meeting readers in real life. So this year, I am taking a different tack…I am going to try and talk to people. Be myself and I dunno, maybe smile some?? Whoa, whoa…tap the breaks, I know. But part of the reason I love Sam and Marcus, and by default this blog so much, is the people they have brought into my life, so I should start showing it, yeah?

Man. That was awfully Serious Sam there, no?? Geesh.

5. There isn’t a five

I just wanted to have five because Amber has five. And we are competitive chicks by nature. Although, when it comes to drinking she wins. When it comes to photoshopping embarrassing manip pics of us…I WIN. OOOO….wait….there IS a 5!! MORE MANIPS IN 2012! It shall be done!

Alright, now here is everyone else’s goal. When you see us at a show and LiLi is whispering in Marcus’ ear or I am drinking a beer the size of my head, you come over and remind us of these. Nicely, of course. We will reward you with hugs.

So, any new year’s resolutions for you gals (and guys?) this year? Let us know in the comments. We LOVE hearing from you!

But, of course, we can’t be that serious bidness about it all. We also like to use the “tags” to make each other laugh and see if the other notices a joke or a jab. And that is when magic happens. Our random tags bring us the most random internet searches, which is cool, because it’s new people hopefully finding new music…but sometimes…yeah, sometimes it’s just ODD to see what people search. And then I have to gchat Amber with a “SHUTTHEFRONTDOOR, go look at our search page!”.

So, today I give you some of the best we’ve seen the past month. Yes, this is only from the last 30 days. One of these days, I will sit down and make an All-Time search list because man, there are some doozies, but for now, here’s a short sample. Italics are my thoughts while reading them. Enjoy!

want to make shirts with our faces on elf bodies- uh…who doesn’t?

shack my soul- is that a euphemism?

bobby home sex videos- it’s call incognito browsing. learn it. use it. you’re welcome.

animaniacs hello nurse holly conlan- yesss…let’s be friends!!!

jib jab sam bradley christmas- hahahahahahhaaha

ingrid michaelson hot- duh.

happy birthday porn- the gift that keeps on giving.

who is bobby long’s girlfriend- not you.

that awkward moment in hawaii- when you dive in the water and come up and realize your bathing suit top is missing a few seconds too late? oh. that didn’t happen to you? yeah. me either.

has marcus foster toured the us- GAH. it’s been so long, people are forgetting whether it was real or not.

boy bobby long- um..as opposed to girl bobby long?

wife points- easy. buy her sam and marcus cds. duh.

sam conlan- wait. did we miss something?

bobby long fanfiction- yeah. not going there again. ever. 

drunk jason segel- is there any other kind?

marcus foster there- nope. he’s here. next to me.

marcus foster drunken fun- ::sigh:: i wish.

tracyvanhorne boob- james, is that you??

“bobby long” stripper- i…uh…what??

www mexican butt shack show .com- lili’s got bills to pay. don’t judge.

bobby long girlfriend fan fic- now you’re just being weird.

marcusclub- this is it! join us! we have shirts!

who makes marcus sport coat- hopefully not the peeps who make his pants. no? anyone?

creepy gifts for women- unless she’s your wife, anything that requires batteries is creepy.

greg holden nice hair- you spelled sam bradley wrong.

funny waffle quotes- wait, what?

canadian bands with xylophones- send me what you find. no really. 

bacon butty- mmmmmmmmmmmmm

when is marcus fosters bday- oh wait. that was us. cause we forgot. again. but no worries. we made him a card:

So there you have it. Just a small peek into the goodness that we see on our stats page everyday. It’s pretty much the only reason we keep this blog going. Well, I mean, other than the fact that we love Sam and Marcus. Obviously.

Today was different though. I woke up and was like, okay. Enough sadpanda. Let’s see what I missed. So instead of working, I watched all of the vids that were posted from the show. Completely normal. And basically I fangirled and then joined Amber in her jealousy.

So what’s two jealous Sam bloggers to do when they miss an epic show??

Watch the vids while gchatting. Duh.

Now, I know you would all just love to read our inane witty banter over ALL the videos but let’s be real here– there’s only so much we can get away with at work. So we had to pick only one video to watch and chat. And, how could we NOT go with the Sam/Marcus song?? Yeah, we know. No brainer.

In case you were like me and not watching out of protest because you couldn’t be there or you just want to watch it again, here’s the vid:

source

And now, buckle up, and see if you can follow our crazy:

Where we don’t get far. At. All.

LiLi: ok…let me get the vid ready

alright

i’m ready

Amber: me too!

LiLi: k

GO

wait. pause

already

can i just say

the blazer

with the plaid

and the vee?

srsly…it WORKS

it’s like combining worlds

Amber: I KNOW!

exactly

it was probably a hot mofo with all those layers

but

worth.it.

at least for us

LiLi: and the lights

uh

yeah

totally

way to take one for the team sam

alright

sorry

had to get that out there

Amber: this blazer has our seal of approval

LiLi: LOL

Amber: SoS Approved!

LiLi: bwahahahaha

i was JUST typing that

#soulmates

Amber: of course!

LiLi: we should put it on a sticker and mail it to him

DM him for his address

Amber: on it….

or

can we just make a graphic

LiLi: BOO

lame

i need his address

Amber: then go through all concert photos and “stamp” them

LiLi: LMFAO

dood

that is birll

Amber: if there is no stamp

LiLi: or brill

maybe a bit of both

Amber: that means we do not approve

LiLi: LOL

Amber: and you should not wear it

ever

or at least in Dallas

LiLi: and we won’t have to have that awkward, uh, yeah, we don’t like this talk

or OKC

should he ever play there

Amber: YES!

still waiting on my date…

LiLi: ::fingers crossed::

Amber: as promised

Where we discuss Sam being adorb. And Fat. And some Marcus guy?

LiLi: ok

ready?

Amber: yes!

LiLi: k

i’m playing it

Amber: me too

LiLi: he’s just intro’d a guy named Marcus?

Amber: who?

LiLi: omg

sam is getting all serious

he’s being adorb

stop

but don’t

Amber: i know right

LiLi: OH

THAT marcus foster

Amber: even when he called himself fat

LiLi: LOL

please

Amber: that guy does looks familiar

LiLi: he’s filling out

Amber: i like when he is filled out

LiLi: as all old people do

fo sho

and ewwww

that was a bit creepy sounding

Amber: that’s why i love it

LiLi: LOL

Amber: oh marcus

drunk marcus

how i love thee

LiLi: did he just ask him if he was drunk?

Amber: yes!!

he did that half head shake that doesn’t really confirm

nor deny

LiLi: well played sir

Amber: which really just confirmed

LiLi: yeah yeah

y’all are all in london

keep whooping

whatevs

Amber: bitches

LiLi: not that i am bitter

at.all

Amber: i like how into it marcus is

he’s just always “feeling” the music

Where we prove, yet again, we are #1 fangirls.

LiLi: yep

this is a slower version, no?

Amber: it does seem slower

maybe without the full band it comes off that way

LiLi: or was it that way originally and then he sped it up for the album?

Amber: or maybe it’s for drunk marcus’ sake

LiLi: LOL

Amber: i can’t remember

LiLi: he’s like, no worries man…i’ll play really slow

Amber: there is a lot of foot kicking by sam

like he’s a ninja

LiLi: and a lot of bobbing and weaving from marcus

i wonder if that’s the music? or the alcohol?

ooooo

GET IT

Amber: get it marcus!

omg!!

LiLi: GET IT SAM

SHUT UP

Amber: BWAHAHAHAHA!!

man

LiLi: i’m glad my office doors are shut and the blinds are closed

Amber: they are IN TO IT!!

me too

LiLi: i am srsly fangirling in here

Amber: this would be awkward

LiLi: uh

Amber: whoa

WHOA!

LiLi: yeah

Amber: you guys

LiLi: srsly

Amber: stop

my heart

LiLi: my mouth just went dry

Amber: it can take no more

LiLi: OMG

that does it

Amber: scream it out!

LiLi: i’ve been killed

this shall be my last post

Where we cross a line. Big time.

Amber: please man hug

PLEASE

LiLi: DAMMIT.

Amber: NOOOOOOO!

LiLi: i needed a man hug

Amber: that would have made it perfect

LiLi: a hip to hip hug

Amber: sigh

yes

with the whispering

i love the whispering

LiLi: oooo

and maybe a head on the back of one’s head

wait…i need to stop

Amber: we may have crossed a line

LiLi: srsly

this is why no one is usually invited to our chats

slash

it’s inevitable that i am going to talk about it

Amber: lmao

LiLi: um

can we watch it again?

Amber: damn

i closed it

LiLi: i feel like i missed so much

BOOO

cause i blacked out there for a minute

Amber: hahahahahaha!

it was amazing

AMAZING

LiLi: srsly

Where we decide to plan Sam’s next tour. Including outfits.

LiLi: i need him to 1) come to dallas again

2) wear that outfit

and 3) sing Lights this EXACT way

and maybe…

Amber: with marcus?

LiLi: letmetouchhishair

uh

Amber: YES!

LiLi: duh

Amber: gah

the perfection of all of that

LiLi: he keeps messing with it

Amber: right?

LiLi: and it’s like a giant tease

Amber: tease

LiLi: like look

i can touch it all the time

and you can’t

whatevs

i’m over it

Amber: maybe he should wear the beanie then next dallas show

help you stay focused on the music

LiLi: come on now

please

that’s just as bad

i mean…

that’s like him coming out in only a white v-neck

Amber: the white v-neck

my kryptonite

i would die

DIE

LiLi: could you concentrate with him only wearing that?

EXACTLY

so

Amber: you would need to carry me out

LiLi: let’s revise

1) come to OKC

2) wear a beanie and white v-neck (and i guess pants)

3) sing Lights JUST LIKE THAT

Amber: pants optional

YES!

LiLi: aren’t they always?

Amber: I support both of those

mainly cause i would be there for both

of course

always optional

LiLi: alright

Dallas– blazer and hair touching

OKC– beanie and white v-neck

shall we write this down?

and maybe get it notarized?

Amber: yes

and yes

and then we’ll send it to sam

i’m sure he’ll dm me back any moment now with his addy

LiLi: cause that won’t be creepy

at.all.

LOL

Where we discuss bacon.

LiLi: OMG

watching again

and he’s there

there

at that moment

all INTENSE

Amber: the faces

omg

LiLi: GAH

Amber: i don’t think i can handle those faces WITH the eff me eyes

LiLi: water. i need water.

oh

that little voice quiver thingy at the end?

um

YES

Y

E

S

YES

Amber: bwahahahahahaha

i honestly am even MORE jealous of those in london

they get EVERYTHING

LiLi: fo REALS

sam. marcus. bacon butties

it’s not fair

Amber: BWAHAHAHA!

LiLi: i mean, i would die to watch them play while actually eating a bacon butty

but that’s neither here nor there

Amber: hahahahaahah

i don’t even know what that is

but you said bacon

so i am down

LiLi: LOL

And there you have it. Another installation of the Amber and LiLi in the Trust Tree.

Did you watch? What did you think? Did you blackout like I did? And what do you think of bacon sandwiches? Delish, no?

Why am I jealous, you may be asking? Obviously it is because of Sam. And partly Marcus. But mainly Sam.

You see, Sam finally performed in London last night. (We made a deal with the London girls a long time ago that we would send Sam if they would send Marcus. We did our part. Still waiting on them to fulfill theirs. Greedy girls.)

And let me go ahead and state the obvious for you all… Sam killed it. I know, you already knew that.

One of our fave people ever, katieh101, was at the show and in true Katie fashion, she videoed the entire show, making it easy for all of us poor saps here in the states to enjoy Sam from far away. All of the vids are here, but I’ve gotta share with you my faves! (UPDATE! We had 4 more videos sent to us from Lynnee08! You can watch them here.)

I don’t know what I love more, the song or the AMAZING word vom (Or perhaps Sam’s Spew? Heh, see what I did there?), before the song. Really people. This is gold. GOLD.

I like Sam’s originals. But he can roll out a few good covers as well. This one here, yep, it’s one of my faves. You know how I love me a good, sappy love song.

OF COURSE, this happened and it was amazing. All it did was make me realize how I didn’t truly appreciate the one time I saw these two on stage before. I didn’t realize what I had then. Treasure this moment those of you who were there, cause these 2 on stage together is such a super rare, super awesome experience!

AND, I need to make a comment on something else. I can’t let this opportunity pass me by.

You may remember LiLi and I not giving the blazer the true appreciation it deserves. We are casual girls. T-shirts, jeans and hats (especially hats) are all we need to make us happy. Yesterday, as promised by Sam via Twitter, he rolled out the blazer again.

And I have to say… Sam, you are doing it right. You made this t-shirt and jeans girl love the blazer again. Maybe it was just the absence that made my heart grow fonder.

And then he proved that he reads our tweets posted on his blog. And the heavens parted and angels rained Skittles on us. Okay, not really. But it felt like that. Even if it was sort of a non-post-post. But, hey, I will take what I can get, yanno? So now, I must blog.

But, sidenote first– my original tweet was this:

which basically means that Sam gave me a Christmas present, right? Does that mean I have to give him one back? Cause if so, well one Mr. Bradley ought to be on the look out for a photo blanket with some familiar faces on it. But the point is…he delivered. And I am so disappointed– in myself. See, had I known he was going to listen/read and actually deliver, I would have asked for more. Duh. Nothing big…just maybe a copy of the early recordings of his new album.  Or maybe a little mention in the liner notes. I mean, it’s whatevs.

But now I am just getting distracted. What I came here to do was to fulfill my side of this fake twitter bargain. I need to post…but about what? This is what I have been asking myself for the past few days, since Sam’s blog post. Cause right now, Sam’s been doing things that we don’t discuss here….maybe we discuss them extensively on gchat….but not here.

And then i saw this pic and my heart stopped.

Mostly because this lady is touching the holy land, I mean his hair, but once I plotted her death I overlooked that part of it, I realized that these are more promo shoot photos. For the album maybe?? Or the new website? Which, as of right now is just a splash page but a very good splash page. One that I might go to and stare at. I’m kidding. Kinda. But it says it right there on the page. New album! New website! New merch! (Which, by the by, better include some koozies. We might have some ideas on that too, so don’t send anything to cafepress just yet, mmmkay?) But, GAH! All this anticipation. All this build-up. All these teasing pics and tweets from the studio! What is going on in there? What is being recorded? When will we know! My poor old lady heart. I don’t know it can take anymore of this– and it’s not even close to being here!

Basically, this blog is an announcement. A hurry-up-whenever-the-release-date-that-has-yet-to-be-even-announced– THROW ME A BONE. I’m DYING here. The end.

PS– now that I think about it, why didn’t I tweet that I wanted tickets to The Couve show?? DAMMIT. I fail at life. Well, for those of you lucky enough to be there and/or within driving distance, GO TO THE SHOW. And take pics. But don’t fix his hair first.

Well, well, well. Here we are. The day of your birth. It occurred to me the other day that your birthday was coming up and since we are your #1 fans, clearly, we needed to highlight this momentous occasion. I mean, you’re 25. A QUARTER of a century. HELLO. This is huge (twss) and as such we needed to acknowledge it with class and dignity. And by class and dignity, I mean waiting until midday to write post this and shower you with gifts.

In an effort to make this the best.birthday.post.EVER, I went through the archives to see what we’ve given you in years past– cause you know, gifts are like dresses, you can’t roll out the same ones twice. But to my horror (!) I realized that we have NEVER given you gifts. UH, WTF?! How could this have happened? We’ve given gifts to this guy. Twice. And even this guy but never you.

Basically, we’ve failed you. But don’t you worry your pretty little head with all that awesome hair that one day I will find the guts to touch. I think we’ve MORE than made up for it this year. Check it:

For you, on approximately 9 months after your mom and dad had too much to drink and made it Business Time:

1. A selection of earrings for the one that walked out on you:

Although, personally, I would ditch the earring and go with the more modern and sexier gauge look. Look how amazing it would look:

AND….you could do this with it too:

Never lose a cigarette again! A WIN-WIN my friend.

2. A copy of Rosetta Stone Spanish. No really. Just a copy. You know what that software costs? But no worries, I will totes photoshop you a legit looking label AND box.

3. Your very own PERSONALIZED Manchester United jersey. I can’t afford the full kit if I’m gonna personalize it, yanno? But all you need is the jersey, obviously:

::enter Amber::

Well, we all know I’ve got major love for you. I mean it. The love runs deeps. I don’t just get drunk and randomly touch the hair of any ol’ guy. Oh no, that’s all saved for you. BUT… I am lazy. And since LiLi clearly went through all this effort to pick out all of these AMAZING gifts for you (and duh, she is the woman in our non-sexual life partnership so of course she nailed it), I decided not screw this birthday up with my lameness. So, I will just virtually “sign the card”. Like this…

I figured it's about time you had at least one autograph from me to the 47 I have from you.

Okay, the guilt is setting in. FINE! I won’t be a total sloth. I took this awesome picture to wish you a happy b-day (and make you feel old).

Cause getting older sucks.

OH, and not to forget the most awesome part of your gifts…

In honor of your day of birth, we also  decided to get together with a couple of our readers and put together a little photo collage of us sending you little messages. In our minds, there were going to be 30-40 photos and it was going to be AH-MAZING! But in the real world, we got 4. But hey, these are 4 VERY dedicated fans, so you should just love us through the good idea and what it could have been.

So I think I speak for us all when we say…

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

From Annelaure

From Christy

From Lee-Ann (clicky to enlarge the awesomeness)

From Lisa

It’s that time of year we hate. And by hate I mean we don’t know what to do with ourselves. No tours. At least not for us– so technically this round of shows doesn’t count. I kid. Sorta. But no shows anywhere near us means, no upcoming trips from Amber to see me so I can watch her drink her body weight in beer and get her 43rd Sam item signed. Sad.

I mean, we know that things are happening behind the scenes and we are all excited but not ::ahem:: fulfilled??

So what’s a blogger to do?

Um, speculate. on gChat. DUH.

Things like:

what songs are being recorded?
will a banjo be a part of this bidness?
did Al’s wife ever get her love letters?
is sam learning to hula?
did the earring come crawling back with an apology for leaving?
who is Sky?

Yes. These are the things that keep Amber and me up at night. Or at the very least keep us from doing actual work and spending all our time on gchat.

But we don’t stop there. No sir-ee. We also like to lament about the things we miss about Sam too.

Like:

“Ask Sam“– where is Oracle Sam to answer all these questions that we know are piled up somewhere in the virtual closet?

THE shirt– where in carmen sandiego is THE shirt hiding? has it been destroyed? was it left at a girls house after a platonic sleep over? is it ::GASP:: lost? I mean, if Sam doesn’t dig THE shirt anymore, s’cool. He can send it to me.  I won’t do anything creepy with it. As long as sleeping in it every night doesn’t count as creepy.

Words with Friends– where is Spelling Bee Sam? I have to admit that I was a bit whatevs when he was throwing out games on WwF because I have a Droid and at that time there was no WwF app on the market….but now….uh yeah….now I have WwF. And I want to kick some spelling ass.

this could be me. sending Sam this word. giggling. and kicking ass.

Yes. I miss all these things. But most of all, I miss looking forward to seeing Sam wearing hats on tour this time around. Not that Amber and I don’t both have fare alerts going for all cities involved. just in case.

what about you? what are you speculating about? and missing? please let us know….we are running out of things to chat about instead of working.

I’ve seen Sam on every tour since Summer 2009 and it looks like he will finally be eluding me. And I am one sad panda about this.

How can this NOT exist on the tour? HOW??

I’ve been frantically searching every travel site, working and re-working flight schedules, checking fares and clicking on every flight ‘deal’ that has landed in my inbox the past week to see if I could make it happen. And I am coming to the dreadful conclusion that I don’t think I can.

::sigh::

The worst part? That week is my birthday week. I already have the time taken off. I will basically be sitting on my ass at home with no where to go cause I can’t get to any of these slightly too north and far too east shows. Well I could. If I took a second mortgage out on my home. But I do have my limits.

And really, does Sam even know how to have a tour anymore without seeing me? Drunk Amber has gotta be a highlight of every tour. Am I right?

I know I am not alone in this. I have seen your tweets. You all pretty much begging and doing things like offering your first born child just to get Sam to swing out this general direction. I even made a little map, just in case Sam somehow forgot.

I think we might need a support group or something. I’m pretty much borderline depressed about this. I may turn to drinking. Oh, wait…

Clicky for a clear view of where we need Sam to be!

And, for those of you situated in that red circle, I am happy for you. I really am. I am not at all seething with jealousy with the other blue circle people. NOT.AT.ALL. And I will be much happier with you if you share pics, videos, stories, WHATEVER so I can live through you vicariously.

So, who is with me on the list of sad and depressed? Who’s taking out the 2nd mortgage? Are you a northeasterner who is going to take care of us all? Let us know in the comments.

Don’t know when Sam is on tour? We got you covered on our Tour Dates page.

Before real life decided to kick us both in the figurative balls, we did this little interview with Sam. We worked on it, got everything about 15 minutes away from posting… then never did. Maybe it was because we were embarrassed. My level of drunkenness and nervous giddy laughing during the interview hit a new high (thanks a LOT to happy hour) and LiLi’s unabashed flirting and falling in love (aka arguing over sports) with John Notto made us both kind of cringe later when we listened to the audio. All I can say is, there is a reason we don’t video interviews. Ever. Cause our editing skillz blow and it’s a lot easier to cut out those embarrassing parts when you are transcribing. Thanks goodness.

BUT, we got some real gems in the interview. Gems, I tell you. We may or may not be working on making some little audio clips of certain parts because they make us truly happy. And yes, some of these questions aren’t as, um, timely as they were then, but it’s still Sam and some of the answers are still fantastic so we are saying screw it and posting them anyway.

So, without further ado and excuse making, we present to you, our interview with Sam!

After the jump, cause this shiz is LONG! (TWSS)

Headlining, Riding in an RV and Cuddling in a Prius

LiLi: so my 1st question to you is, this is like 3 tours now…
Sam: Yep.
LiLi: That you’ve been on. Two supporting, one headlining.
Sam: Yep.
LiLi: How’s it different?
Sam: Uh, there’s less people.
Amber: laughing No…
Sam: No, what?
Amber: still laughing
Sam: No, no, no, this is not… I, it’s…
LiLi: No. Hey, go for it.
Sam: It’s the truth. There’s less people. We get a longer set. There’s a different sound. It’s more rocky. We worked on the songs a lot more, and um, there’s a full band. Last time it wasn’t a full band so I’m a lot happier there. Um, it’s also different in that there are different people around. Holly, for example. We’ve just had a lot of fun. We’re great friends, the band and I and Holly and the band and her band and all that band.
LiLi: Everyone’s band.
Amber: Everybody’s friends.
Sam: Yep, everyone’s friends. Um, we’re in an RV for uh…
LiLi: All of y’all? Or just you? Like, all of y’all?
Sam: No, just the band. Well, my, Dustin, and my band and I.
LiLi: Right. I thought you meant like you and Holly…
Sam: No, no.
LiLi: I thought, that’s a lot of people.
Sam: They are in a Prius.
Amber: A Prius??
Sam: Yeah.
Amber: Ooooo…
Sam: They’re like really going for it.
LiLi: Legit.
Amber: Oooooo…there’s lots of cuddling going on there. I don’t know, there isn’t much room.
LiLi: Do you feel like it’s a different set of responsibilities as a headliner as opposed to supporting?
Sam: They’re not in my hands, those responsibilities. Those are left to Dustin.
LiLi: Gotcha.
Sam: Um, but, um, essentially the same things happen. I don’t realy let it go too far out of my radar. I try and concetrate on just music and that never happens, so…
LiLi: Well, ya know.
Sam: It’s okay, I don’t want that to happen.
LiLi: Well…
Sam: One day.

Recording, Touring and Getting Drunk at Country Music Festivals (Complete with Mooing)

LiLi: What? You wanna ask?
Amber: No, I was just looking, like I can read right now…
LiLi: See if you can read right now. I’m very excited to see how this goes down.
Amber: Oh, so what are we doing after the tour ends?
Sam: We’re going to try and record.
Amber: Oo!
Sam: We’re going to try and get some of these new songs down. And then after that, um, I think what I am going to do is go out by myself and try and make it so I am, kind of, not taking three month gaps.
LiLi: Yeah.
Amber: Okay.
Sam: And just keep, we’ve got some ideas like, trying to do like a college radio circuit kind of thing.
Amber: Mm Hmm.
LiLi: Yeah.
Sam: Trying to just, uh, play as much.
Sam: laughs
Amber: laughs
Sam: Trying to um, yeah, just play as much as possible. That’s the plan. And then also I am going to go to a country music festival with my mom.
LiLi: Oh yeah?
Sam: And I am going to get drunk for seven days.
Amber: YES! clapping
LiLi: Wow.
Amber: Are you excited?
Sam: That’s why I moved to Canada, this music festival. There’s like 200,000 people.
Amber: They have a country music festival in Canada? Cause I had know…
Sam: It’s called Merit Mountain Music Festival. Kenny Chesney is playing this year, which I am not a huge fan of the mooer. Um, he’s a bit of a mooer. Mooing
Amber & LiLi: laughs
LiLi: Yeah…
Sam: You know what I mean. But there are other people playing so, I…
LiLi: Yeah, I know…
Sam: It’s not always about the music. It’s about the camping, and my camp is usually full of music anyway.
Amber: Yeah.
LiLi: Seven days? That’s pretty awesome.
Sam: Yeah. Seven days. I’m like, oh, my cousin is coming up from England and my aunt as well. And they are like serious rages.
LiLi: Nice!
Amber: laughs
Sam: So it’s going to be great.
Amber: That’s amazing.
LiLi: That’s pretty legit for right afterwards.

Loving Our Phones, Remembering EVERYBODY and It’s No Secret… Amber is Drunk

Amber: Okay, so now we are going to go really serious and by really serious I mean not serious at all.
Sam: That’s good.
Amber: Um, so okay… quick,  the RV is on fire. All the men are safe. What do you grab before you leave the RV?
LiLi: Not the music. You can’t say that cause, yes…
Sam: My phone.
LiLi: Well…
Amber: Good call.
Sam: Definitely my phone.
Amber: Why didn’t we think of that?
LiLi: That’s what I would grab. I mean, that’s like my life now.
Sam and Amber: laughing
Sam: mimicking a phone call The RV is on fire. Someone please come and help.
All: laughing
Amber: Someone please come stop the fire.
Sam: My band are okay.
All: laughing
LiLi: Yeah, but I’d probably grab it for other things too..
Sam: Yeah, games.
Amber: And pictures, and…
Sam: How can you ‘boo’ when you don’t have your phone?
LiLi: Thank you.
Amber: Yeah, for real.
Sam: laughing
LiLi: But I also have books, and other stuff…
Sam: Oh, you read on your phone and stuff?
LiLi: Yeah.
Sam: Hmmm.
LiLi: It’s better when you have a Droid. Oh, sorry you iPhone people.
Sam: Well… I’m really proud.
LiLi: laughs
Amber: I love my iPhone too.
Sam: I’m not backing down.
Amber: I love my iPhone too. I think it works really well. And I like my Nook to read on.
LiLi: Yeah you do.
Amber: laughs Okay, oooo… this is great. This is, I came up with this. So, everybody talks about that you have like this knack for like, remembering everybody that comes to your shows, which kind of…
Sam: Sucks for me because when I don’t it’s a really bad experience.
Amber: Do you not?
LiLi: Do you really?
Amber: Do you not though? I mean, really? Do you not remember somebody?
LiLi: I’ve never seen you not.
Sam: Yes.
Amber: No. Shut up.
Sam: It’s like, it happened, I only need a little nudge, and then I’ll be like, oh yeah, yeah. And then they don’t believe me. But…
LiLi: See that’s cause it’s amazing. How do you remember all of it?
Amber: But that’s the heart of our question. How do you remember? Is it photographic memory?
Sam: I have no idea.
Amber: Is it word association?
Sam: I have absolutely no idea.
Amber: Cause we were like, if it’s word association…
LiLi: Cause part of me…
Sam: In the rest of my life, I am so bad with names.
LiLi: Really?
Sam: So bad with names, faces, I just don’t know. But I guess it’s because it’s really important to me and that’s not a very fun answer but it’s true.
LiLi: Yeah, it’s…
Amber: I was hoping it would was word association so we could be like quizzing you on what words you use…
Sam: Yeah, sorry. I’m not fun.
Amber: …for different people. That’s no fun.
Sam: Not fun.
LiLi: Yeah, but it’s genuine.
Sam: Slamming these down with the truth.
Amber: So you could be like Amber… Drunk.
All: laughing
LiLi: Yeah, well you know…
Amber: Please read questions. I shouldn’t be allowed to read the questions.
Sam: Well, we’ve known each other awhile now.
Amber: awkward pause
LiLi: It’s not a secret anymore Amber that you like to drink.
Sam: Yeah…you spilled.
Amber: It’s not… yeah, I did just spill on myself.
LiLi: Legit! I can not wait until about a month from now..
Sam: laughing
LiLi: And I’ll be like ‘remember when you drooled?’ It’s gonna be awesome.
Amber: laughs I didn’t drool. It just like rolled out the side of my mouth.
LiLi: Yeah, you know…
Amber: That was really embarrassing.

Blogging is Hard Work, Sam’s Pews and SOME People Find Us Funny

LiLi: Um, so, my question is, obviously we are a big fan of blogs, cause we have one. But your blog, very interested in that. How’d that come about? And how did the name come about? Cause I’m gonna say, I love the name.
Sam & Amber: laughing
LiLi: When I first saw it I was like, yes…
Sam: I wanted to start one a couple years ago but I just didn’t think I’d be able to keep it up to date and as you can see…
LiLi: It’s hard.
Sam: I’m struggling right now.
Amber: We don’t know about that at all.
LiLi: Yeah, we struggle a lot.  So…
Sam: But it’s just like, yeah, it’s just like, when do you find the time? Like, especially in like, this situation. I think when I get back home it’ll be okay.
LiLi: Yeah.
Sam: Once I figure out a good system cause what I really want to do with it, what I wanted to do was start uploading pictures. We’ve got like, fucking, thousands of pictures now. Of like, good ones.
LiLi: Yeah.
Sam: Not ones that are just awful and you can see all my ear hair and it’s just awful.
Amber: laughing
LiLi: You’re like, ‘Here we are getting gas. Hi.’
Amber & Sam: laughing
Sam: Uh… yeah, and the name, yeah yeah, so I’m just struggling with keeping it up but I do have a lot I want to put on it. Like, Like I want, I want to have more of a conversation on it. Like, not necessarily…
LiLi: Like comments and responding to comments and stuff.
Sam: Yeah, responding to comments and stuff. I don’t, like, I want to approach things like, uh, the next one soon that I want to do is on the Catholic church.
Amber & LiLi: Oooo…
Sam: And there’s a speech by Stephen Fry?, I don’t know if you know who he is…
LiLi: Yes.
Sam: It’s a really good speech.
LiLi: And what is about in reference to the catholic church? I might be catholic, so let’s talk about it.
Sam: Well, he’s arguing on why the catholic church is not good in the world.
Amber: That’s interesting. I’m sitting here and am intrigued.
Sam: I’m not saying it’s true. It’s not my opinion necessarily but I’ve had conversations not… I just want to see who is reading.
LiLi: Yeah, I’d love to hear it cause then I’ll send it to my mom….
Sam: It’s so fucking good.
LiLi: …who is a little crazy.
Sam: So, uh… yeah. Um, and the name, the name Sam Spews or Sam’s Pews. Um…
LiLi: Did someone think it was Sam’s Pews?
Sam: Yeah.
LiLi: Like those are your church pews?
Sam: The Church… The Church of Sam.
Amber: The Church of Sam.
Sam: Which is not what I had intended.
LiLi: I thought it was Sam Spews.
Sam: Which I did see that before I… but I, it’s Sam Spews. And it’s Sam Spews because it’s all bullshit and um, it’s just gonna come out anyway. You can’t help it.
LiLi: I like it.
Amber: That’s how I feel about our blog most of the time.
LiLi: I know.
Amber: It’s all bullshit.
LiLi: We get so much hate for our blog too. We’re like…
Sam: Really?
LiLi: Yes.
Sam: I think it’s hilarious. I’ve heard so many people say how fun it is.
Amber: Are you serious? We have so many people that just don’t like us.
LiLi:  Are you serious? We get so many people that will email us and be like “y’all should really take this seriously!” I’m like but there are people out there that take it seriously and why can’t we just be.
Amber: We’re trying to have fun.
Sam: I think it’s hilarious.
Amber: Why can’t we have fun??
LiLi: Well thanks! See? I’m gonna tell them, ‘Sam says it’s hilarious, so gah, back off.’ I’m just kidding.
Amber: It should be scary when I don’t have fun anymore.
Sam: Yeah. Yeah.
Amber: It’s scary.

LiLi Spews, Sam’s Reggae Moment and John’s Rocky

LiLi: Um, okay, this is going to be like a big question, so brace yourself.
Sam: Okay.
Amber: Is this super serious, or no?
LiLi: It’s long. It’s long.
Amber: I don’t remember. I think we got out of order.
Sam: Okay.
LiLi: Well…
Sam: Is it in different parts or do I have to listen to you speak for awhile?
Amber: laughing
LiLi: I don’t know. Maybe it’s a monologue. Maybe I’m expressing some… I don’t know…
Sam: Yeah, that’s what I thought. LiLi spews.
LiLi: It might be in different parts.
Amber: laughing LiLi spews….
LiLi: There’s a lot of different questions in here. Okay. As for me, one of the things I feel, one of your biggest assets is that fact that you appeal to a wide variety of people because your songs are a lot of… there not just like one specific genre. You know, you play a little country, a little rock, a little, you know… I mean, so I’ve always wondered, I mean, is that intentional? Like you try and do that or is it just like lost in the moment when you are creating and this is what comes out?
Sam: 100% its just what comes out. Um, I also like lots of different types of music and I also do not enjoy, uh, a CD that sounds the same the whole way through.
LiLi: Like it’s just one sound?
Sam: So, so, like, and another thing, and there are lots of bands and lots of artists that I could speak about but I am not going to mention anyone.
Amber & LiLi: laughs
LiLi: NO!
Amber: You don’t have to talk in the microphone.
LiLi: No one was mentioned at all. It was just generalizations.
Sam: Yeah, exactly. Generalizations. growls Yeah, so basically, I, you know, I kinda want to try more as well. And I guess, my biggest criticism from like an industry point of view is that I don’t have a specific sound. So nobody knows what to do with me.
Amber: What section of the CD store do they put you in?
Sam: Well, it’s not that. It’s like, for example, a publicist or a record company or a manager are all, you know, where do we put you.
LiLi: Right.
Sam: And I’m really okay with that because that’s like me, so it’s fine. But like, there have been some criticisms about that. Uhhhhh, yeah.
LiLi: But, like as far as all those genres out there, do you identify more with or the other? Or are you just like hey, i  like them all. I want to do them all.
Sam: I like them all. I want to try some reggae eventually. I want to definitely do a solo album one day. Maybe not a whole album, but definitely an EP. I want to do a country EP. Just purely country EP. I want to do a, um…
LiLi: Alright, we’ll listen to ‘em if you make us.
Amber: Okay, gah…
Sam: Yeah, you don’t like country?
LiLi: Twist our arm, no, I am just saying…
Sam: No, okay.
LiLi: I’m from Texas. How can I now like country?
Amber: Why are you looking at me? You’re looking at me.
Sam: I know. You looked at her. So I figured… But right now we’re going a bit rocky. We’re going a bit rocky.
Amber: He knows its me that dislikes the country.
LiLi: I noticed that. It’s like, we’ve watched a couple videos of the tour, people send them out and stuff like that, and so we looked and them and said, man he’s going a little rockier.
Sam: Yeah.
Amber: Yeah.
Sam: Which is nice.
LiLi: Yeah.
Sam: That is all down to also the influence of the musicians, and stuff like that. John’s brought a bit of a rocky side and I fucking love that. And I, you know, it’s going to keep expanding.
Amber: John is awesome.
Sam: Yeah, John’s good.

Arm Wrestling, Guilty Pleasures and Words with Friends

Amber: Okay, wow, we’re already here? Okay…
LiLi: Well, we skipped a couple.
Amber: Did we?
Sam: Why?
Amber: Yeah, why?
LiLi: Well, we didn’t know how much time you’d have.
Sam: I got loads of time.
Amber: You got all nervous. I want to go back and read it.
LiLi: I will ask you this…. I mean this is serious, serious. If y’all are in the RV and there is the 4 of y’all. Cause there’s 4 of y’all in there right? In the RV?
Sam: Five.
LiLi: Five.
Sam: Dustin
Amber: Oh, Dustin. Don’t forget Dustin.
Sam: Drums, bass, guitar, me. So yeah, John, Mark, Jeff, myself and Dustin.
LiLi: Maybe you can help answer this too, I mean seriously, if y’all had to do a arm wreslting contest, who would win?
Dustin: I would lose.
Amber: You would lose?
Dustin: I would.
LiLi: These are the questions I think of.
Amber: These are the questions we think of late at night.
Sam: I think, uh, I would win.
Amber: Really?
Sam: But I’ve said this before once and, uh, I’ve never tried. Actually maybe John might win. John’s got man strength.
LiLi: Man strength…
Sam: No, John might win. I don’t think Jeff would win although Jeff’s quite toned. I just, I don’t know, maybe. Maybe it would be, but then again Mark’s really strong too.
LiLi: It’s not really muscle though. It’s determiniation.
Sam: Yeah, determination, well then…
Amber: I’ll go get John and then we’ll try it.
Sam: Shall we try it?
LiLi: Yeah later on, be like, come on! Show that muscle.
Sam: I think we’d all kind of even out. Actually maybe I’d lose. I have no idea.
LiLi: I’d probably lose.
Sam: But Dustin’s not winning.
Amber & LiLi: laughing
Sam: No, he already said. I’m allowed to say that.
Amber: Okay, I’m gonna read seven. I know why skipped it.
Sam: Actually I think John would win. That’s my final answer.
Amber: John would win.
LiLi: Oh, I did skip it cause I didn’t want to confess mine.
Amber: Hehe… your guilty pleasure…. Okay, so everybody kind of has that like guilty pleasure, that one thing that they kind of like, it’s kind of lame that they are in to, like….
Sam: Masturbation.
LiLi: No, no.
Amber: No. Not that.
Sam: Oh, sorry. Too guilty.
Amber: laughs Too guilty?
LiLi: You went there and I like it, but I was like wow.
Sam: laughing
Amber: We were thinking more like…
LiLi: You went straight there.
Amber: Like really bad tv shows that you watch, like I watch all the Ghost Hunters, like I have them DVR’d forever and then I watch them right before I go to bed…
Sam: Right. Yep.
Amber: And then like scare myself shitless. And then LiLi has her thing, which is, you know, go ahead.
LiLi: I might get in my jammies and get all the blankets in the house…
Sam: And just roll in them?
Amber: laughs No!
LiLi: I like, put them all on me, get on the couch and watch old school BBC costume dramas.
Sam: Okay.
Amber: So, we were wondering, like, if there was like one thing, that was like, your guilty pleasure thing. One thing, like, what is it?
LiLi: Don’t say masturbation again.
Amber: Don’t say masturbation.
Sam: Well, no, I’m not, I’m not.
Amber: Well, you already said that so we’re going to count that as one. What’s number 2?
Sam: laughing No, I didn’t say that for myself.
Amber & LiLi: laughing
Sam: I was using it for an example.
Amber: Sure, sure.
Sam: Um, my guilty pleasure is probably, oh gawd.
LiLi: We won’t tell anybody.
Sam: laughs I don’t….
Amber: We’re not recording this at all.
Sam: laughing I’m really… no, I don’t think I have…
LiLi: See, cause no one knows that I do that.
Sam: I, see I…
LiLi: Don’t tell anybody.
Sam: My answer is, um, I want a good one.
Amber: Maybe it’s hard. It doesn’t have access to TV like we do in in the RV.
LiLi: No, the answer doesn’t have to be TV based.
Sam: You know, I like to drink. That could be a guilty pleasure. Drink and uh, I don’t know. I don’t have too many guilty pleasures. Maybe I don’t, my….
LiLi: Cause I have a friend that likes….
Sam: My phone is my guilty pleasure. I’m on my phone all the time reading news and… but it’s so boring I don’t want to give that as the answer.
LiLi: It’s not boring.
Sam: It’s pretty boring.
Amber: But speaking of your phone, like the Words with Friends deal. You did this whole thing for awhile where you are like, ‘I’m gonna play somebody once a week on Words with Friends.” And then that kind of stopped so we were wondering, what was your record? Were you just losing and that’s why you kind of…
LiLi: Be honest. You got beat a lot didn’t you?
Sam: Was I losing? I’m going to show you something…
LiLi: Did you get beat a lot? And you were like, I’m over it.
Amber: You were like, I’m over it, I’m not gonna play anybody. And I was like smacktalking you big time, so maybe that was me.
Sam: I, I, I lost a few games, yeah. But there was this one person that I was playing off of Twitter that was just ridiculous. And they killed me.
LiLi: And you were like, I can’t do this anymore.
Sam: Yeah, no I, that didn’t stop me. I still went. Okay, but I want to show you my highest scoring word…
Amber & LiLi: laughing
Sam: Against someone called ‘Miss Deviant’.
LiLi: ooo
Amber: Miss Deviant.
LiLi: That’s my other name. Sorry, didn’t I tell you that? No?
Amber: That’s definitely not me.
Amber: ‘sleazier’ Ooooo, very nice!
Sam: That’s pretty good!
Amber: 154, shit. I was gonna say my high is like 101.
LiLi: Oh my gawd.
Sam: That’s pretty good. I was pretty happy with that. So, I won.
Amber: We weren’t sure. It just kind of went away, and we were like maybe he’s just… Or people were getting insane.
Sam: Yeah it went away because…. one of my friends, one of my friends was living with me for awhile in London. And then uh, and then got busy and stopped living with me and so I had to look after a house that I didn’t, uh, know what to do in. And so I started playing Words with Friends.
LiLi: You’re like, look at this! On my phone!
Sam: When I wasn’t writing I was, I thought it would be a great way to….
Amber: Damn these iPhones!
Sam: Yeah. I didn’t want to watch too much tv and so, and I didn’t want to spend too much money cause London’s disgustingly expensive.
LiLi: I know. I am going next week, and I’m like, I have no money to go. I’m gonna go to like Tesco everyday and be like, whatta got for the night?
Sam: Tesco is good, like…. yeah, Tesco’s good.
LiLi: That’s pretty much whatI am going to do next week. Every day. Just go in there.
Amber: That’s a good plan. I don’t know what Tesco is but I am very excited for your plan.
Sam: Tesco is a supermarket.
LiLi: There’s like right outside the place I’m staying.
Amber: Excuse me… I’m like, that’s a great plan.
Sam: Where are you staying?
LiLi: Bayswater. Like right there, there’s a little hostel right there…
Sam: I know it well. [SoS Edit: We realized later that the video for 'Woman You Crazy' was filmed in Bayswater before this interview. WIN!]
LiLi: I can just pop right and be like ‘hey, there’s the Tesco, there’s the Tube, I’m out.’
Sam: I spent many of my days in Bayswater.
LiLi: Just gonna see what happens in the next week. See what goes down.
Amber: Next week, I’ll be at home….
LiLi: Oh, yeah. Sorry.

Amber: Working, so… that’s all of our questions.
LiLi: Did we go through all of them?
Amber: Yeah, we did. Son of a bitch. And we were all like, ‘oh my gawd, we have 10 questions. What if we don’t get through them all?’ We went to a bar and like really figured these out earlier today. It was very, VERY serious.
LiLi: Yeah, we did.
Sam: When do you go home? It’s a holiday today, isn’t it?
Amber: I go home tomorrow morning.
Sam: You go home tomorrow morning?
Amber: I catch a flight at 7 o’clock to go home. So…and go to work.
LiLi: Yeah, tell me.
Sam: You gotta go to work?
Amber: Yes.
LiLi: I gotta go to work too.
Amber: Gotta go make some money to get this back.
LiLi: Yeah. Yeah, I get to take her to the airport.
Amber: Yeah, so that’s our fun tomorrow.
Sam: And, how’s the uh, volleyball team? Is it volleyball?
Amber: Oh, he remembered.
LiLi: Everyone did really well this year. It was kind of annoying because we kept having playoffs. Our soccer team won state.
Sam: Really? Wow.
LiLi: They are really good. It’s annoying how good they are because I kept having to go with them, and it’s a lot of late nights.
Sam: But, um, yeah, and then I’m the only one into football… soccer.
Amber: Well who’s your football team again?
Sam: Soccer team? My soccer team is….
Amber: Or soccer, whatever, I mean, I totally knew that you meant soccer instead of football.
LiLi: You like Man U, don’t you?
Sam: I also like Tottenham, and I also like…
LiLi: Now, how can you be a Spurs fan, and also root for…
Sam: I’ll tell you why, because Manchester United was the first team that I, uh, chose, when I was like 8 or 9.
LiLi: Yeah…
Sam: I then I supported Fulham, because I was involved with Fulham. Then, um, I supported Tottenham once I moved to Canada because it was the team my dad supported. And I figure I became more of an appreciator of the game.
LiLi: I got ya. So you played, what, for Fulham’s underage team?
Sam: Yep. For awhile.
Amber: What position?
Sam: Uh, I was right midfield and I also played striker eventually. So I quit. I quit. I wasn’t there for very long. I was.
LiLi: I’ve only seen one premiere game my entire life. It was Charlton when they were in the premiere league. They’ve since been relegated. You know, it was good.
Amber: I haven’t seen any…
Sam: But they’re amazing. Were the matches in England or were they…
LiLi: I couldn’t believe. I mean, it’s just I walked in and holy, cause I mean, we watch it on TV all the time and then I come in and I’m like holy crap this is it.
Sam: Yeah.
LiLi: And there is this guy next to me the whole time just shouting crazy obscenities, like you know…..And the next thing, in the next breath he was like ‘do you want some hot chocolate?’ Cause he had this little, like 8 year old girl with him and I’m like this is the best thing I’ve ever been too. He’s all trying to make sure his 8 year old daughter’s alright while shouting ‘you fucking…” I mean, he was just going nuts and I was like, ‘this is awesome.’
Amber: That is amazing.
LiLi: Yeah.
Amber: Gah, I’m so jealous of you for getting to experience that.
Sam: There’s time.
LiLi: Come with me.
Amber: I saw some of the highlights from the Barcelona- Man U game.
Sam: Ugh, they were playing during my ffffff… show in Arizona.
Amber: That’s another reason you played bad, right?
Sam: laughs
Amber: I’m just kidding.
Sam: I had driven through the game, so I was upset about that, but it’s fine. I can get over it. So we play the show. I’m exhausted. My voice is gone and I’m just like, I’m trying, I’m trying my best and I look up and the replay of the game. So I hadn’t gotten, seen anything yet . I knew the score, but I hadn’t seen anything. And it kept going on. Not once. Not twice. Like 20 times during the set and that was, that was pretty touch to ignore.
LiLi: Yeah.
Sam: It’s alright.
Sam: So, you gonna cheer extra loud tonight?
Amber: Yeah.
LiLi: Duh.
Amber: I cheer extra loud every time.
Sam: I think a lot of people bought tickets and can’t come.
LiLi: Are you serious?
Sam: So you need to cheer extra loud.
Amber: Well, we bought 4 tickets between the 2 of us, so…
Sam: Did you really?
Amber: We’ll cheer loud enough for 4 people.
Sam: Cool.
Amber: It was kind of not on purpose.
LiLI: I promised Amber I’d be drunk at this show and I’m going to fulfill that promise and I’ll cheer really loud.
Sam: Why?
LiLi: Cause I’m never, I never get drunk.
Amber: And I always am, so…
LiLi: So I was like we’ll switch spots and look, she’s drunk and I’m not. I’m like, ah well, you know.
Amber: I’m not that bad today. Okay, maybe I am.
Sam: Yet.
Amber: Pssh, yet?
Sam: There is still….
Amber: Is there a bar upstairs?
Sam: No.
Amber: Do we know?
Sam: I think you have to bring your drinks up.
Amber: See? I won’t, I will be okay because the laziness will override the need to be drunk.
LiLi: I’ll do it.
Sam: It’s a nice room up there though. Did you go in?
Amber: No, they wouldn’t let me. They were like uh-uh, it’s not open yet.
Sam: Have you been here before?
LiLi: I mean, I’ve been to pretty much every venue around here but I’ve never actually seen a show here, so I was kind of excited to actually…
Sam: Yeah, it’s nice. One of the oldest venues in Dallas?
LiLi. Yep.
Amber: They were saying they are celebrating like 100 years of being open.
Sam: 100 years… and then need a new roof too as well.
Amber: laughing
Sam: No, really…
Amber: They are raising money for a new roof.
LiLi: And they need a credit card machine.
Amber: Please be sure and tip. We need a new roof.
Sam: Yeah.
Amber: After all these storms lately, I bet so.
Sam: Yeah, has it been bad here?
Amber: Yeah.
LiLi: It was scary for awhile. We had to take cover.
Sam: It was?
LiLi: Yeah.
Amber: We had to take cover last week. Good thing you weren’t here last week. It was scary last week.
LiLi: The sirens went off in my neighborhood.
Amber: We had the sirens.
LiLi: And was I like, ‘gah, this is is. This is it. we’re going down.’ I was like, oh my gosh.
Amber: We got the closed toed shoes, the bike helmets…
Sam: Yeah.
Amber: This is like old news for me. I’m like, whatever tornado.
LiLi: See, I’m not used to that…..

LiLi: And after this you are going to San Antonio. Have you been to San Antonio yet?
Amber: Oh, please ask him about this.
Sam: No, never been.
LiLi: Gah. You know what, that’s where I was born. I’m from San Antonio.
Sam: Oh, okay.
LiLi: So, I’m like… it’s intense there, I’m just saying.
Sam: It’s intense?
LiLi: Yeah.
Sam: Like, how intense? Like, what am I dealing with?
LiLi: You know Spanish right? So you should be okay?
Sam: Yeah, I’m really, I’m fluent.
LiLi: I’m asking.
Sam: No, I don’t.
LiLi: Cause I mean, I am see.
Sam: Right, so…
LiLi: I might be writing a post where I send you some Spanish phrases to help you out.
Sam: Okay, okay.
LiLi: I’ll post it tomorrow.
Amber: Things like, you know, “help me, I’ve been stabbed.”
Sam: We are… oh man. You know when you drive from New Mexico into Texas and then there’s a…
LiLi: Juarez?
Sam: Yeah, there but um, it was just, yeah, it’s just after and the patrol.
LiLi: Oh yeah, where they stop you?
Sam: They got us out. They…
LiLi: Were you nervous?
Sam: Yeah we were all, like even though we had nothing on us…
LiLi: Are you serious? Come on.
Sam: It’s like the amount of times they ask you, like ‘do you have any narcotics on you sir?’ ‘No.’ ‘do you have any narcotics on you sir?’ No. ‘are you sure about that sir?’
Sam: So, John…a question was asked that who do you think would win in an arm wrestle out of everyone in the band.
LiLi: Cause you look pretty strong.
Sam: And Dustin said no, it wouldn’t be him.
Amber: We’re feeling like it might be you.
Sam: Yeah, so like my final answer after jumping around on everyone was you.
John: I don’t know.
Sam: I don’t know either.
John: I don’t.
Amber: We’re going to have to do something about this.
Sam: But my first answer was me.
John: My first answer was you too.
Sam: I know.
LiLi: But I hear you’re a basketball fan.
John: I am.

But I digress.

As of today, I now have concerns.

You see, I decided to be the best fangirl I could possibly be and tried to find the link to buy tickets to the Honolulu show since they go on sale today. I wanted to tweet it out there for all you lucky people that can actually make it in hopes that you will be so appreciative of my kind generosity that you buy me a ticket to fly out there. Or at least send me a lei. Everyone likes a good lei.

So where do I go to find said ticket link? My trusty Google search bar. And the first video result for “The Venue Honolulu” is this:

Um, Sam. Let’s talk for a minute.

I get that you love the ladies as obvious by the babes you always seem to be touring with (Brooke Fraser, Holly Conlan and now Jenny Owen Youngs). I don’t blame you. I do my best to surround myself with hot guys as well. Like this.

But inquiring minds want to know… are you playing in a strip club? Like, will ladies be sliding up and down poles while you sing “Woman You Crazy”? Or maybe Mark will show us all what he’s got. I mean, he is single and I can think of no other way to attract a klassy lady. Of course, I already anticipate that we’ll get to see you up there, cause that’s just the kind of guy you are. Duh.

Either way, if there is a pole in your midst and you are feeling amorous, do me a favor? Bring the industrial size can of Lysol and the economy pack of Clorox wipes. I’m sure there is a Sams, Costco, Wal-Mart, SOMETHING where you can get these things.

I’ll even break down and buy a t-shirt if you promise me you will.

And to every one else hitting Honolulu for what is sure to be a fine couple of performances…. bring a video camera. Or else.

P.S. By the way, I got that ticket link for you guys. You can get your tickets right here. Note that the venue is not kid-friendly or dog friendly. Further proof that this place is probably a strip club.

P.P.S. This place has $3.50 martinis ALL DAY LONG! Couple of those and you’d see me on the pole as well. I kid, I kid. Sort of. I better take that t-shirt I’m buying and make me a pair of these, just in case.

P.P.P.S Of course, you should let us know in the comments if you are going so we can hate be jealous of you. As well as harass you for pictures and video later.